When does a communication start?

This is a common question I ask during my trainings or talks: When does the process of communication ends? And when does the process of communication starts?

Most people are intelligent enough to know that questions framed this way usually means that the answer is NOT when you stop speaking and when you start speaking respectively. So I will not insult your intelligence by implying that as the baseline answer. 😀

What I will do is to take the speaking phase as the initiating point to discuss where the starting and ending points are. I will not discuss the speaking phase so as to focus on the entirety of the communication process. As with all questions of this nature, the answer really depends on why you are asking the question but the awareness of the entire process better positions you to identify if any part of your communication is missing anything.

Also, I am using speaking as a proxy for all forms of communications, which include electronic means as well as human communication: verbal, tone of voice, body language and otherwise. The nod to a colleague across a crowded meeting table as a signal to initiate a pre-planned action is also a single self-contained communication for the purpose of this article.

This is one of a two part article on communication. When Communication Ends is here.

When communication starts

This one is a little more tricky to discuss. Let's project the process backwards beginning with the last going backwards to the first and you you can decide what else you need to do to enhance your communication:

1. 
   Preparing - You set up the environment for a successful communication. Do you need get someone else's buy-in to pave the way for that of your principal target? I am sometimes accused of having a meeting to have a meeting. Yes, I often do an informal chat with two or three persons to discuss how the meeting is intended to go. That could be because I am such a control freak that I aim to write the minutes before the meeting. Also, have you considered the facial & body language angle, which constitute 70% of our communication? I often prefer glass tables during interviews as what people do with their hands & feet in stress situations are quite a give away. My then boss often spends some time directing who in our team sits where before a meeting with a client starts: so that he is positioned to see a specific person's response when we raise a potentially contentious point. The list of preparation is not exhaustive.
2. 
   Planning - You collect the information required to support the communication and think through the content of what you wish to communicate. This phase is plenty covered by many textbooks and articles. So, I will just contribute some tips I think wouldn't be that easily available: write out your communication in full even if you intend to only speak it - writing helps clarify your thoughts; count how many points you have and just remember that number - count them as you deliver them so you know you are complete; make sure there is a logical sequence to your communication - it also helps you remember; if you have too many points, look for somewhere to write them down - your note pad, on the board before the meeting starts, or even hide them as agenda points.
3. 
   Identifying - You identify the person you want to communicate with and determine the best means to execute a successful communication. Textbooks often tells you to tailor your communication to the audience - how right they are. For this you not only need to know the world of the other person (discussed briefly in point no 5 below) but also the context and objectives of the other person at that point in time, which changes with the work cycle or with the current situation. Are you trying to communicate something of lower priority for the other person even if it is of urgent priority to you (eg, because they have budget submission to do)? Are you asking an action from someone whose hands are tied because their boss has just resigned? You will need to put yourself in the shoes of the other person to make sure the communication will be received in the manner you intended.
4. 
   Objectives - You work out why you wish to communicate what you want to communicate and identify what would make the communication a success. Knowing the objectives often also mean defining the outcome of a successful communication. What do you want your communication to lead to? What is the project goals or strategic intention that provides the context of your communication? With this, you can figure out the factors that will engender success for your particular communication. That could determine the manner of your communication - not just the how, but the when, where and who as well.
5. 
   Knowing the person - You familiarise yourself with the world of the persons you have identified as stakeholders with whom you will eventually be communicating. It may be strange to say that your communication starts well before you even had a need to communicate but let's face it - unless, you only just knew them, you would have no time to analyse your audience. You would build on what you already know about the person well before you need to communicate. It is always a fallacy to assume that if the person is an accountant/lawyer/etc, they would respond in a particular way. But each person is a person, each with their own aspirations, fears, likes and dislikes. Each has their buttons you could press or avoid and you need to know what makes each person tick based on their personal nature and history. Ultimately, always remember you are communicating with a person with a heart and mind, not a job title.
6. 
   Knowing the population - You familiarise yourself with the networks of your potential stakeholders and the individual inter-relationships among them. An organisation is made up of a network of interacting of individual and/or group relationships. Sometimes, the path to a successful communication goes through several persons, each receiving the same or different but related communication, which builds on the previous one. In this scenario, the sequence of your communication may be critical. There is also a need to consider alliances and respect/deferment relationships where obtaining the buy-in of one critical person can have a cascading effect on getting the buy-in of others. Your knowledge of the network, based on your observation of how did who does what with whom, will lay the ground for successful communication when you execute it alter.
7. 
   Knowing the organisation - You familiarise yourself with the culture and ethos of the organisation that you will be communicating in. Often, each formal & informal organisation has official, and more importantly unofficial rules, on how communication is to be effected. More fundamentally, there will always be a mindset that governs thinking, attitudes, context, culture or some similar ethos in any group and you must always be mindful of these when considering your communication. For instance, are you trying to convince a data-rational person in a data-analysis organisation on how to performance manage their secretary undergoing emotional turmoil?

Note: Most textbooks on communication stops at No 4. This should adequately deal with the 'what' of the communication but the phases following deal with bigger picture relating t the context within which the communication takes place. You may not need to follow through with every single phase above, as it all sounds pretty onerous but with practice, you should be able to complete each of these phases on the fly, with the simpler communications going through a truncated version of the phases, or even skipping some phase altogether.

So, take a look at why your communication was not effective - did you start thinking about your communication too late?